FORUM; QUESTIONS

3. Amy writes that she understands that boys get the wrong picture when told not to do something ('Don't run around corners') - but that surely they must get to understand that 'don't' means don't and learn to accomodate and cooperate as they get older.

Basically the answer to this is NO. Boys, especially 'dyslexic' (picture thinkers) boys see their thinking as a series of pictures. Rather than words in their heads, they have pictures. If we say 'tennis racket' they get a picture of this in their head. If we say 'no step-ladder' they get a picture of a step-ladder in their head. There is no picture of 'no', nor of 'don't'. If we say "Don't leave your skateboard on the drive" - they get a picture of a skate-board on the drive. They do hear the words, but the words themselves have little significance for them - and certainly not the significant impact that the picture does, even at an unconscious level.

Recently I went to a friend's for dinner After patting the dog I headed for the bathroom to wash my hands. As I left the room my host advised me "Don't touch the towel rail, it is very hot."

I washed my hands, dried them on the towel provided, and as I turned to leave the room, my left hand reached out - and grabbed the towel-rail. It was a completely unconscious action on my part, and I left the room with a burned hand, much to the mirth of my friends.

I am 60 years old, of reasonable intelligence, and had just that afternoon presented a seminar looking at 'dyslexia', and the impact of the word 'don't'. To me it was just one more example of the difficulty of living with 'dyslexia' - although on this occasion with no significant outcome.

No, it doesn't go away, and many of us never get to to really be in charge of its impact.



4. Beth writes that she understand 'hyperactivity' and the role of various 'foods' in this, but she is sick of having her beauty-sleep disturbed 50 times a night by the sudden scratching and jerking of her hubby in bed at night. She sees a similar thing in her ten year old son.

This one really pushes buttons for me, because this has been my story for all my life, and it doesn't seem to be diminishing in any way.

For me food additives are the culprit - with ice-cream being one of the worst, although beer and wine are in there too. One small helping of standard ice-cream, or one small can of beer or wine and my whole night is ruined. The effect is two-fold.

In the first case there is the needling effect. About every five or six seconds it feels as if a single needle is being gently inserted into my skin. This happens at any point of the body, and demands instant direct attention - a vigorous scratch - much to the chagrin of my sleeping wife.
I've tried to ignore it, but it drives me mad. And it drives her insane.

The other effect is what I call 'hyper-energised' muscles. In this it is as if various muscles are grossly over-charged with energy, and they then suddenly flex - extend or contract - as a means of expelling or using up the energy - again invariably waking 'she-who-matters-most' who has just got back to sleep after my last scratch.

Diet control is my only weapon on this one, and it basically means personal deprivation of anything yummy after 3.30pm. But sometimes I think "Oh heck.... In reality there is nothing much I can do about it, but understanding my body reactions makes it a lttle easier to tolerate.